Saturday, May 7, 2011

3 months late, and a dollar short $

Tomorrow (the 8th) Is exactly three months that I haven't posted anything. I know, I've been horrible. I'm sorry..   But Everything has been insane around here! For one, I moved to the desert. I'm living in La Quinta, California now! Well, When i'm not with my family back in Murrieta that is. It's kinda like. for every 5 days I spend here, I spend 2 at home. Ya digg? Also, I'm working at Forever 21, in the Palm Desert mall! So if you wanna come buy some stuff for me, it would be greatly appreciated ;) hahah But really.. It's a nice change. I love the desert, My heart has always been torn between the desert, and San Diego. I figure i should give them both a try, to see which one I prefer! So, BAM! Here I am.

I'm sitting outside on the patio right now. It's 1:13 am and I can't sleep. My arm is killing me. So i decided I would write, since I haven't in so long. I love this place.. And It's not even as much to where I can put it into words. You have to experience this for yourself. During the day, Yes.. It does have a tendency to get a little warm. But who spends all day outside?? No. Most people have jobs. or do productive things indoors for the majority of the day! I happen to like the heat. The hotter the better! Especially, after 14* weather in Holland for so long. I could use a little sunshine, Or a lot. hahah It's still warm out. I'm in shorts and a tank top, in the middle of the night and it's beautiful. At a certain time of day here, the mountains that surround my house turn Blue.. Yes, Blue! They aren't like Murrieta Mountains. These are rocky, and much larger. You see all kindsa cool animals running all over them if you get close enough. Rams, birds, lizards, and the occasional mountain lion........ ugh. Around 7, when the sun starts to go down they become blue, and fade to black as night sets in. You can always see the top of them.. It appears that the sun never fully goes down because there is always a faint blue glow from the opposite sides of the ridge. The air smells like honeysuckles, since the flowers are everywhere out here. It's smelled like this for as long as I can remember. and when the darkness consumes, the desert birds, and bugs come out. You can hear the loud clicking of the locusts, and the chirping of the crickets, While on the other end you're hearing owls, and other birds I can't really Identify. I'm sitting staring at the stars.. It's really beautiful. You can't see stars like this anywhere else. And it seem that the longer you sit and stare, the more that appear..

Have you ever heard of those people who go "hunting for aliens" out in the middle of the desert? They make weird hats out of tin foil, and will camp out for days on end waiting for an invasion, that they swear is going to happen? Now I see why they come out here! It's silent, and you can see every star in the North, western hemisphere.

Things have been moving so fast recently, I can hardly keep up. But i'm beginning to realise that that's the game in itself. Trying to keep up. Those who can, thrive, those who can't.. Flounder, and fail. I'm trying my hardest to be the first of the two. Continuing to be a productive human being, day by day, and leaving those who aren't behind. I enjoy waking up, and going to work, then coming home only to run errands, make dinner, go to the gym, shower, go see some friends, come home, watch a movie, and go to bed. It's busy. just the way I like it. Idle hands are the devils playground, they say, right? It's true.. and I'm tired of being bored with the way things are. I want to wake up everyday and be so stoked about what i'm doing! At this point, what i'm doing is working.. and i'm fine with that for now. I am kinda in limbo when it comes to school, though. Just to be honest. I really hate school.. There are just so many other things that I could rather myself be doing! Like... NOT being in a classroom listening to a monotone, unenthusiastic, dried up, old hag of a teacher teach you about something that they, themselves cannot even do. But that's what's the norm i guess. Go to school, get a piece of paper that says you wastes thousands of dollars, and countless hours of you time learning about something that isn't really going to make you money, or make you happy.. So I guess that's the next step. I was always good at school.. Especially English. Math? Forget it. But English I loved. I just don't really have a firm grasp on what it is i want to do. Is that normal? Is being almost 20 like a cutoff mark for your uncertainties? Orrrrr have I been allotted a little more time? I sure as hell hope so.. Because If so, Imma have to get on this shit ASAP. hahah

Quite frankly,  I kinda just want to go live under a rock.. And stay there for a while. Just seclude myself for days.. maybe a month? Grab nothing more than a backpack filled with necessary items, and a tent and run off to Indonesia for a month or two. Travel around, meet people, see things. That sounds perfect. I will do that one day.. Hopefully. Speaking of seclusion, I went to Whitewater the other day. For those of you who don't know what, or where it is.. It's beautiful.. and it's this little dirt road that you take about 4 miles back, and it places you in the middle of some of the most beautiful scenery California has to offer. There is a river, that fills up around this time of the year with the water from the snow run off.. It's awesome. I was there for probably 5 hours.. Did just about 6 miles by the time I left, and literally sat in the water, in the sun, for probably 3 hours. hahah it was fantastic. The water was cold, and fast, and I figured why not? Who was going to say anything? There wasn't ANYONE for quite a while, and it was hot. So in i went! it was so nice. Got some sick tan lines, and ended up getting my car all wet, and sandy.. But it was worth it. :) I loved every minute of it.

Well, it's practically 2 am. I think I need to go to bed soon, or I should at least attempt. Sunday is mothers day, and tomorrow, Saturday, I am going back home to Murrieta for the holiday so I can spend it with my family. I'm excited :) Now, off to bed. I promise im going to start writing these more. I need to. It makes me feel better!

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